Blonds

A blonde decided that she was tired of her empty life... - Read on..
A blonde decided that she was tired of her empty life. She cut her hair and dyed it brown, and set off for a drive. She wanted to do ..

51 DAYS - Read on..
51 DAYSA bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door burstsopen and in come four exuberant blondes. They come u..

What is the difference between a blonde and a phone booth? - Read on..
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth? A1: You need a quarter to use the phone. A2: Only one person c..

What do you call a blonde with white eyes? - Read on..
What do you call a blonde with white eyes?full up......Sent by Rob..

Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? - Read on..
Q. Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?A. It took her a month to realize she could play it at night...

Judi and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends... - Read on..
Judi and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends.Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!Judi: That's nothing; last nig..

The complaint letter from Judi - Read on..
The complaint letter from Judi:We blonds at the ofise are tired of all the the dum stoopid jokes about us. We think this is hairassment..

Blondes dumb?!?!? - Read on..
Blondes dumb?!?!? After many hours of extremely acrobatic and exhausting sex with ablonde he had just picked up, a man goes into the ki..

A blonde and a brunette were talking one day... - Read on..
A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette saidthat her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Head..

A blond at a party was telling her friend... - Read on..
A blond at a party was telling her friend thatshe was off men for life. "They lie, they cheatand they're just no good. From now on when..

Why Blondes do not make good cattle herders? - Read on..
Why don't Blondes make good cattle herders.Because they can never keep two calves together...

A young blonde girl goes to the doctor for a physical... - Read on..
A young blonde girl goes to the doctor for a physical. The doctor puts his stethoscope up to the girl's chest and says, 'Big breaths.....

Whats a blondes favorite surgery? - Read on..
Whats a blonde's favorite surgery?A Slipodictomy...

What is the difference between butter and a blonde? - Read on..
Q: What is the difference between butter and a blonde?A: Butter is difficult to spread...

Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap? - Read on..
Did you hear the one about the blonde fox that got stuck in a trap?She chewed off three legs and was still stuck...

An easy solution - Read on..
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she mo..

A young blonde woman is distraught... - Read on..
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. T..

What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? - Read on..
What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in Spring training...

What did the blonde say... - Read on..
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? "Look! they spelled MACY'S wrong...

Why do blondes like lightning? - Read on..
Why do blondes like lightning? They think someone is taking their picture...

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? - Read on..
Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side...

At the Doctors... - Read on..
At the Doctor's... -A young woman said to her doctor, "You have to help me, I hurt all over." "What do you mean?" said the doctor..

A Blonde... - Read on..
A Blonde A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She we..

I cannot find a cause for your illness... - Read on..
"I can't find a cause for your illness," the doctor said. "Frankly, I think it's due to drinking.""In that case," replied his blonde pa..

This guy and a blonde are making out feverishly... - Read on..
This guy and a blonde are making out feverishly in the front seat ofhis car. After an hour or so, he whispers in her ear, "Do you wantt..

A business man got on an elevator in a building... - Read on..
A business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered theelevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by..

I was shopping at our local supermarket... - Read on..
I was shopping at our local supermarket.When I got to the checkout line, there was a beautiful young blonde ahead ofme.As she placed he..

A peculiar birthday card - Read on..
This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. Sheasks the clerk if they have any new and different cards -- somethin..

A blonde decides to try horseback riding... - Read on..
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had nolessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and th..

How do you confuse a blond? - Read on..
How do you confuse a blond?You don't, they're born that way...

What do you do when a Blonde throws a grenade at you? - Read on..
What do you do when a Blonde throws a grenade at you?Pull the pin and throw it back...

How do you get a blondes eyes to sparkle? - Read on..
How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle? Shine a flashlight in her ear...

How did the blond break her leg while raking leaves? - Read on..
How did the blond break her leg while raking leaves?She fell out of the treesent by Chris..

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M Factory? - Read on..
Why did the blond get fired from the M&M's Factory?She threw away all the w's.Sent by Chris..

Whats the difference between a blond and a Mosquito? - Read on..
Whats the difference between a blond and a Mosquito?The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.Sent by Chris..

Why do blondes drive BMWs? - Read on..
Why do blondes drive BMWs? Because they can spell it...

What do you call a blonde lesbian? - Read on..
What do you call a blonde lesbian? A waste...

Why did the blonde fail her driver license exam? - Read on..
Why did the blonde fail her driver's license exam? She wasn't used to the front seat! Why did she finally pass her test? She to..

What do a moped and a blonde have in common? - Read on..
What do a moped and a blonde have in common? They're both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one...

How are a blonde legs like cheese wiz? - Read on..
How are a blonde's legs like cheese wiz? They're both useless unless they're spread!..

How do you change a blondes mind? - Read on..
How do you change a blonde's mind? Blow in her ear...

How do you change a blondes mind #2? - Read on..
How do you change a blonde's mind? Buy her another beer...

How do you confuse a blonde? #2 - Read on..
How do you confuse a blonde?Put her in a round room and tell her to pee in the corner.How do you confuse her even more?Ask her where sh..

Why does a blonde only change her babys diapers once a month? - Read on..
Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers once a month? Because it says right on the box "good for up to 20 pounds."..

Why do all blondes all have a dimple on their chin and a flat forehead? - Read on..
Why do all blondes all have a dimple on their chin and a flat forehead? Finger on chin I don't know. Hits forehead Oh I get it..

Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow? - Read on..
Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow? So that when you pull their tits, they don't moo...

How do you drownd a blonde? - Read on..
How do you drownd a blonde???You place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.Sent by L&S..

Why does a blonde girl always have a bruise around her belly button? - Read on..
Why does a blonde girl always have a bruise around her belly button???Cause blonde boys aren't that smart either...

One day a blonde went into Wal-Mart and... - Read on..
One day a blonde went into Wal-Mart and saw something she liked. The Blonde asked the clerk what it was. The Clerk said it was athermo..

What do you call a line of blondes standing ear to ear? - Read on..
What do you call a line of blondes standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel...

How do you know when a blonde has been working on your computer? - Read on..
How do you know when a blonde has been working on your computer?There's white out on the screen and lipstick on the joystick!..

Three blondes were driving down the highway trying... - Read on..
Three blondes were driving down the highway trying to get to Disneyland. They saw a sign that read 'DisneyLand Left.' So they went ho..

Why do blondes wash their hair in the kitchen? - Read on..
Why do blondes wash their hair in the kitchen? That's the proper place to wash vegetables...

Why do blondes use so much shampoo? - Read on..
Why do blondes use so much shampoo? The instructions read: LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT..

How do you keep a blond(e) busy? - Read on..
Part I: How do you keep a blond(e) busy? Give him/her a bag of M&Ms and ask her to alphabetize them. Part II: Why does that work? 'Does..

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? - Read on..
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? Seven...one to mix the batter and six to peel the M&Ms...

A blonde goes for a job interview... - Read on..
A blonde goes for a job interview in an office.The interviewer decides to start with the basics.'So, Miss, can you tell us your age, pl..

Why could not the blond pass her drivers test? - Read on..
Q: Why couldn't the blond pass her drivers test? A: Every time the car stopped she jumped in the backseat...

Why are blonde jokes so short? - Read on..
Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them!..

What is a blonde mating call? - Read on..
What's a blonde's mating call? I think I'm drunk...

How can you tell if a blond has been sleepwalking? - Read on..
Q:How can you tell if a blond has been sleepwalking? A:When you look in the refridgorator and there's lipstick all over the pickles...

Why was the blonde looking in the refrigerator? - Read on..
Q: Why was the blonde looking in the refrigerator? A: Because The organe Juice said concentrate..

What do you call 2 blondes in the front seat of a car? - Read on..
What do you call 2 blondes in the front seat of a car? Dual air bags!..

A blonde was plugging dollar after dollar into... - Read on..
A blonde was plugging dollar after dollar into thecoke machine at a large Vegas casino. She keptpunching the buttons only to have happe..

What do you do if a blond throws a grenade at you? - Read on..
What do you do if a blond throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back...

What is a Blondes favorite nursery rhyme? - Read on..
What is a Blondes favorite nursery rhyme? Hump me dump me..

A blond walks into a bar... - Read on..
A blond walks into a bar. Ouch!..

There are three 3rd Grade girls... - Read on..
There are three 3rd Grade girls, a blonde, a brunnett, and a red-head.Q. Which one is the tallest?A. The blonde -- she is 18 years old!..

What do spaghetti and blondes have in common? - Read on..
What do spaghetti and blondes have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them!Sent by Sonia..

Judi was bored with driving her BMW... - Read on..
Judi was bored with driving her BMW. It laced individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied somet..

Counting cars - Read on..
A blond sees a brunette standing in the middle of the highway.The brunette keeps saying, "88, 88, 88..."The blond calls to her as the c..

There are three friends, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead... - Read on..
There are three friends, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead.They were on a cruise ship and it was heading home. When theygot about 20..

What do you call three blondes on Santas Lap?? - Read on..
What do you call three blondes on Santa's Lap??Ho Ho HoSent by Adam..

Three women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde... - Read on..
Three women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde, all come home from work at the same time and get on the elevator. The brunette notice..

Two blondes were walking down the street... - Read on..
Two blondes were walking down the street. One noticed a compact on the sidewalk and leaned down to pick it up. She opened it, looked in..

Two blondes were walking through the woods... - Read on..
Two blondes were walking through the woods and theycame to some tracks. The first blonde said "These look like deer tracks." The other ..

What's the difference between a computer and a blonde? - Read on..
What's the difference between a computer and a blonde? The computer is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on...

WHAT DO YOU CALL A BLONDE STANDING ON HER HEAD? - Read on..
WHAT DO YOU CALL A BLONDE STANDING ON HER HEAD?A BRUNETTE WITH BAD BREATH!Sent by ÇãM..

What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head? - Read on..
What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head?All you can eat for under a buck...

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor... - Read on..
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor.The doctor asked her what had happened to herears and she answered, "I was ironing a shir..

Fly, baby, fly! - Read on..
A police officer arrives at an accident scene whereapparently three blondes have leaped to their deathfrom a very tall building... he s..

How can you tell if a FAX was sent by a blonde? - Read on..
How can you tell if a FAX was sent by a blonde? It has a stamp on it...

What is six inches long, has a bald head, and drives blondes crazy? - Read on..
What is six inches long, has a bald head, anddrives blondes crazy? A hundred dollar bill...

What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer? - Read on..
What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer? Hey! There's some things even a blonde won't do...

What are the worst 3 years of a blondes life? - Read on..
What are the worst 3 years of a blondes life?The 1st grade...

What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? - Read on..
What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates?A mobile sperm bank...

A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck... - Read on..
A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into alumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office andsaid, "We need some fou..

How do you know a blond has been using your computer? - Read on..
How do you know a blond has been using your computer?When the joy stick is wet!Sent by Richard..

Why don't blondes use vibrators? - Read on..
(Q) Why don't blondes use vibrators? (A) Because they are scared they might chip thier teeth!!!Sent by T.L.Glenn..

Which 3rd grader has the best body, the blonde, brunette or redhead? - Read on..
Which 3rd grader has the best body, the blonde, brunette or redhead?The blonde - she is eighteen...

How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping? - Read on..
How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping?The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard...

How long? - Read on..
This blond teenage dragged her boyfriend to the court on paternity issue.The lawyer asked, "How long are you having a sexual relationsh..

A blonde named Vikki decides she wants to try... - Read on..
A blonde named Vikki decides she wants to try horseback riding one day. So Vikki mounts the horse, taps its butt, and the horse starts ..

Why was the female blonde confused... - Read on..
Q. Why was the female blonde confused whilst going to the ladies toilet??A. She had to pull her own pants downSent by sam..

A blonde went to the appliance store sale... - Read on..
A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain."I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman."Sorry we don't sell..

Have you ever read Shakespeare? - Read on..
One blonde to another...Have you ever read Shakespeare?No. Who wrote it?..

What does a blond and a turtle have in common? - Read on..
What does a blond and a turtle have in common?When they lay on their backs they're screwed!..

A blonde walked into a doctor's office with a hole in her hand... - Read on..
A blonde walked into a doctor's office with a hole in her hand. Thedoctor told her that he had to report all gunshot wounds, and this w..

What do you get when you cross a blonde with an ape? - Read on..
What do you get when you cross a blonde with an ape?A retarded ape...

A blonde came running home to her mother... - Read on..
A blonde came running home to her mother, sobbing and hysterical."What's wrong?" her mum, (another blonde) asked."My boyfriend's just d..

How can you tell a blonde has been working on the... - Read on..
Q: How can you tell a blonde has been working on the computer?A: There is white out on the screen..

Why couldn't the blond pass her drivers test? - Read on..
Q: Why couldn't the blond pass her drivers test?A: Every time the car stopped she jumped in the backseat...

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car... - Read on..
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car.Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that theblonde behind the wheel was kn..

A visual joke - Read on..
(This joke requires the use a small visual. I'll describe the visualfirst, then as I tell the joke I'll cue you when to use it) Visu..

What's the differenc between a blond and a mosquito? - Read on..
Q: What's the differenc between a blond and a mosquito?A: A mosquito stops sucking once you whack it...

What does a blonde say after sex? - Read on..
What does a blonde say after sex? Thanks Guys...

Why do brunettes take the pill? - Read on..
And more on blondes...Q: But why do brunettes take the pill? A: Wishful Thinking...

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies? - Read on..
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies?Three...one to mix the batter and two to squeeze the rabbit...

A drunken blonde goes into a bar... - Read on..
A drunken blonde goes into a bar. The bartender asks her what she would like, and she replies, "Gimme a beer." The bartender then asks,..

Three Blondes were driving to Disneyland... - Read on..
Three Blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours they finally saw a sign that said "Disneyland -- "Left"..

Why does a blonde have curtains on her PC? - Read on..
Why does a blonde have curtains on her PC?To open windows..

How do you know a blonde has just lost her virginity? - Read on..
Q: How do you know a blonde has just lost her virginity? A: Her crayons are still sticky...

WHY CAN`T BLONDES WATER-SKI? - Read on..
Q: WHY CAN`T BLONDES WATER-SKI?A: When they get their crotch wet they think they have to lay down...

WHY ARE BLONDES SO EASY TO GET INTO BED? - Read on..
Q: WHY ARE BLONDES SO EASY TO GET INTO BED? A: Who cares?..

A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm... - Read on..
A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wa..

What is it called when a blonde blows in another blond's ear? - Read on..
What is it called when a blonde blows in another blond's ear?Data transfer...

Why did the blonde go half way to Sweden and then... - Read on..
Why did the blonde go half way to Sweden and then turn around and come home?It took her that long to discover that a 14 inch Viking was..

Clean restrooms - Read on..
On her way home the same blonde drove past another sign that said"CLEAN RESTROOMS 8 MILES".By the time she drove eight miles, she had c..

What about the blond guy whose wife gave birth to twins? - Read on..
What about the blond guy whose wife gave birth to twins? He wanted to know who the other man was.....

This blonde and her boyfriend were sitting in a hot tub... - Read on..
This blonde and her boyfriend were sitting in a hot tub when the blonde said to her boyfriend,"Is it true that if you pull you finger o..

Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock... - Read on..
Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger.Blonde#1: I can't seem to get this..

What did the dumb blond say to the large breasted waitress... - Read on..
Q: What did the dumb blond say to the large breasted waitress after reading her name tag? A: What did you name the other one!!..

A blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded woman... - Read on..
A blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The b..

Two blondes were facing each other with a lake between them... - Read on..
Two blondes were facing each other with a lake between them. The first blonde wants to get to the other side so she yells to the otherb..

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being... - Read on..
A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her "go do something to prove them..

A couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adopt... - Read on..
A couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a..

So there were two guys on a roof, pounding nails... - Read on..
So there were two guys on a roof, pounding nails. One guy pounded a nail in, then picked up another. He was holding the nail upside dow..

What do you get when a blond stands on here head? - Read on..
Q: What do you get when a blond stands on here head?A: A smelly burnette.Sent by Tiffany..

A blonde calls the fire department cause her house was on fire... - Read on..
A blonde calls the fire department cause her house was on fire. They ask her how to get there and she says "Duh, big red truck?!."..

There was a blonde and a brunette in a car... - Read on..
There was a blonde and a brunette in a car. The brunette hears a siren behind them, so she asks the blonde if its lights are on. The bl..

Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark... - Read on..
Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man. The man was screaming, "Help me! Help me!"Mary Jane l..

What do you call a blonde that just came out of the closet? - Read on..
What do you call a blonde that just came out of the closet?The Hide and Seek champion of 1992...

Commiting suicide - Read on..
A blonde and a brunette are living together. The brunette came home from work one day and the blonde had a rope around her waist. The b..

Without a horn - Read on..
Judi went to a "Dude Ranch" on vacation. The cowboypreparing the horses asked if she wanted a Western orEnglish saddle.Judi asked what..

I'm not so sure evolution is indeed a valid theory... - Read on..
I'm not so sure evolution is indeed a valid theory. I mean, thinkabout it -- if it were, wouldn't all blondes have grown handlesby now..

What have a blonde and a computer got in common? - Read on..
What have a blonde and a computer got in common?You don't realise how much you miss them until they go down on you!Sent by Tiggsy..

Did you hear about the new paint on the market? - Read on..
Did you hear about the new paint on the market?It's called Blonde. It's not very bright, but it spreadseasy!..

What is the smartest blonde? - Read on..
What is the smartest blonde?A golden retriever..

What do you call a blonde in the freezer? - Read on..
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?A Frosted Flake...

A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist... - Read on..
A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients arecomplaining that they can never reach me." Psychiat..

How do you break a blonde's nose? - Read on..
How do you break a blonde's nose?Place a dildo under a glass table!..

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? - Read on..
What do you call a brunette between two blondes?Translator...

How can you tell if a blonde is a redneck? - Read on..
How can you tell if a blonde is a redneck?If she can chew tobacco and suck dick at thesame time and still know which one to spit out...

Why do blondes like blonde jokes? - Read on..
Why do blondes like blonde jokes?It makes them feel popular...

What did one of the blonde's legs say to the other one? - Read on..
What did one of the blonde's legs say to the other one? Between you and me we could make a lot of money!..

A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job... - Read on..
A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job.The officer wants to ask her a few questions.... Officer: What's 2+2? Blond..

Moon Mission - Read on..
Moon MissionNASA is launching a rocket to the moon. On board there are two pigs and Kiki, a stunning blonde. When the rocket is outsid..

A blonde began a job as an Junior school counselor... - Read on..
A blonde began a job as an Junior school counselor, and she was eager to help. One day during break she noticed a boy standing by hims..

She was so blond... - Read on..
She was so blond, she thought Boys II Men was a daycare center...

Two Tourists - Read on..
Two TouristsTwo tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciat..

A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember... - Read on..
A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that ..

Lost In The Snow - Read on..
A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what herdad had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wai..

The Video Rental - Read on..
A blonde named Mary decides to do something really wild. Something shehasn't done before, so she goes out to rent her first X-rated adu..

Buying A Bull - Read on..
Buying A BullTwo sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch.Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in fina..

What's the difference between a blonde and a shower? - Read on..
What's the difference between a blonde and a shower?The shower has to be turned on before it gets wet...

Why did the blonde insist her partner use a condom? - Read on..
Why did the blonde insist her partner use a condom?She wanted to save a dogie bag for later...

What's the difference between Elvis and a smart blonde? - Read on..
What's the difference between Elvis and a smart blonde?Elvis has been sighted...

What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb? - Read on..
What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb?Well, the light bulb is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on...

No exit - Read on..
An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess; the route they were flying had a stay-over in another city. Upo..

Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop when... - Read on..
Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop when the grocer calls to them, "Bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!"The girls stop an..

Why did the blonde climb the glass wall? - Read on..
Why did the blonde climb the glass wall?To see what was on the other side...

Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing? - Read on..
Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?Because the runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide...

What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes? - Read on..
What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes?The back of her head...

Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? - Read on..
Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?She missed...

Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks? - Read on..
Why shouldn't blondes have coffee breaks?It takes too long to retrain them...

Why did the blonde return her new scarf? - Read on..
Why did the blonde return her new scarf?It was too tight...

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing... - Read on..
An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work onscaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.They were eating lun..

Blonde on blonde - Read on..
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports carand was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blo..